I create this amazing picture and post of an item I absolutely love, but often find myself hesitating to post it onto Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. As my thumb hovers over the “post” button, I am awash with worry. Am I posting too many pictures of this makeup? Am I being pushy with my love for this brand? My biggest fear is that I’m becoming that dreaded spammer that everyone hates.
Do my friends and followers think I’m spamming them? Do they feel I’m pushing them to buy a product they have no interest in? Am I blowing up their timeline?
Surprisingly, there are many times I cancel my post and save it for later or for never (eventually being lost in the labyrinth my phone album filled with 6000+ photos).
And the dreaded day came, an acquaintance of mine sent me a message on Facebook telling me that she didn’t know why she was seeing so many of my posts (aka it was blowing up her feed) and that she believes that I’m beautiful with or without makeup (as if to tell me not to try so hard- at what? I have no idea).
The new reveal that my favorite makeup company, Younique, came out with on July 1st (3D Fiber Lashes Plus) got me all excited again about sharing all these amazing products with my friends and followers. But it didn’t squash my apprehension and anxiety over how others will take it. Not one bit.
Being the reflective person I am, I spent some time thinking about why this makeup is so important to me. Why I still post about it and haven’t given up on it yet (like I’ve given up on Pure Romance, for example).
I definitely don’t wear it for others. Not for any man or any woman. I often wear makeup when I’m not doing anything or not even leaving the house for the day.
And I love love love playing with my makeup and experimenting with it when I’m home alone.
I started wearing makeup late in my teens (like 19 years old!). My family looked down on people who did and often scoffed at any “girly-ness” that is exhibited. The tomboy I was as a child wasn’t natural for me. It was forced. I admired the women and girls that got to do up their hair and wear makeup and dress fashionably, while my hair was disheveled (my father often called me a cheetah) and covered at all times when in public; I wasn’t allowed to wear makeup of any kind; and always dressed super conservatively.
To top it all off, I had a terribly thick unibrow- a special gift from my father- and a mustache! Yes, a mustache! (It was such an embarrassment).
So imagine having to maneuver the world of beauty and makeup when you’re already an adult. And not waiting that long because you chose to, but because you weren’t allowed to.
These are some of the reasons why I embrace makeup and fashion and hold them so dear to me.
I wear makeup for me, because I love it. Not because I wear it for others.
But why Younique?
I used to be a Sephora addict. Buying all this expensive makeup that I wear for maybe a month and then for some reason it no longer feels right and I no longer like how it makes me look. Not a single makeup product I bought from Sephora was ever used up in its entirety. I always ended up throwing the makeup away when (in the best case) I’d only used up half of it and (in the worst case) I’d used it a handful of times and then “lost” it in my makeup drawers and then had to throw it out when I realized it’s been expired for a year already.
In the few years I’ve been wearing makeup (before switching to Younique) I threw away hundreds (thousands?) of dollars on my makeup. Yes. Threw money away. I may as well just have flushed the cash down the toilet. (This is when I feel like I’m a telemarketer with all my cliches that ring so true)
I have so many reasons why I love this stuff and want to share it with everyone. And when I think about all of this, I realize that this is why I am so passionate about this brand.
I wish I could get angry at myself for letting how others react to what I post affect me. But it is who I am. I care about how people perceive me and I care about what I do that affects them (even when they can just unfollow or unfriend me or choose to hide my posts).
I will continue to post on social media all about the wonderful brand of makeup that I use and I will continue to fight the apprehensions I have at how others will react.